God drew the plan of My and Your life
He began with – what we happen to call Earth
He added lands, waters, airy space
He greened soil with a shield of nature
He added animals – and then we were called into being.
I am created – I live
I am called to live
I summon my dark thoughts – what for?
I am. I am. Am I?
I stop my march suddenly…
I wandered towards…It doesn’t matter…
What if it’s all false?
My sense of being, loving and breathing
Is a nonSense?
I freeze. Standstill.
Fear of emptiness or… worse;
Fear of being only
a part of (an) experiment…
It takes away my dignity and my will to stay here
Me and You – we were all named as humans.
I am a woman, You – a man.
We vary by gender.
We say ‘yes’ to somebody,
Then we bear children from the unity of bodies
The family emerges.
We create microworlds producing the macroworld.
We work, we meet, we eat, we love, we shake our hands to say hello and
Then we excrete.
In the rhythm of days, months, years
With the growing numbers – what we call years,
I press ahead – we call it old age here on Earth.
I work, I earn, I spare for tommorow.
Stop! This grey hair, wrinkles,
Incompatibility of age, of body and soul,
Flabby breasts, shrunken body,
But here I go, I step, I walk towards the next stage.
Sitting in an armchair, through the window in the living room
I am watching the neighbourhood
Leaves have fallen from the trees. It’s colourful – so many hues.
I immerse my eyes in the distance
Seemingly infinite – I can see only the space of the forest,
However limited – there are only 10 hectares of trees.
What if… the sense has no sense and
My life is only an experiment…
Translated by Olga Gulla